March 19, 2012 by J. Truett Glen
My Foolishly Dear Lustmoth,
I fear that you have disproved my expectations of your skills too quickly and too severely to ever have my wise counsel come your way again. I should have taken your cousin’s word for it that you were a premature graduate of the basic school and in need of major technical correction. Maybe after pondering my words during the long upcoming gauntlet of starvation and pain, which you shall surely receive because of this trespass, you will come back to the front as a knowledgeable and crafty tempter. Hear me now as I make note of your folly.
After your patient’s run in with this vessel of disgusting light you should have done as I suggested and led the young man’s mind to think about the act of execution rather than the eternal outcome of it. Instead, all that you were able to achieve was a coffee house run in with an anarchist group which only spouted nonsense about the illegitimacy of the governmental system all together. This patient of yours is at least a cooperative human and at most a concerned citizen. You shot too low, my little neophyte. Now the boy, after several sleepless nights during which you brought nothing to distract him, has questioned the Enemy’s emissary on what happens to people when they die and has in response put his faith in the Son of our troublesome Foe. You better pray to our Feared Master that the boy does not really mean, with all of his heart, what he has reportedly confessed with his mouth. Did you feel the presence of the Enemy when he mouthed these blasphemous words? Did you find yourself dizzy and overcome by some horrid Spirit? If not then that was just a figment of the ignorant fool’s imagination, a feeble attempt at feeling better, and we are still in the clear. If the second hypothesis is true of your patient then we can capitalize on it in two different ways. We can either focus on revealing to the patient how unfulfilling religion is, making him an atheist or deist, or we can steer him towards one of our many congregations that are completely made up of our people.
The first proposition will spark, consciously or unconsciously, a bitter reaction in all future confrontations with anything that resembles true religion and improve our chances of pushing him towards any one of our many deceptive perspectives on life. The later option will root the young patient in a group of our people who practice the shell of Christianity without touching on any of the real meat which the Enemy is pleased by. What is truly scrumptious is watching those poor entrees of ours continuing in the deception that they are participating in their particular denomination to please the Enemy, but who are in actuality only doing it for their pride and for us.
If your patient really meant what he said, then we will have to employ a completely different strategy. Instead of having the opportunity to plump up a good morsel, for our present and future devouring, we now would have to protect ourselves from losing any more patients because of his conversion. We would have to employ strategically defensive measures before we could begin a counter attack. Discover a solid conclusion on this matter and report to me as quickly as your inept performance allows you to do so.
Your decreasingly loyal mentor